Yesterday was a very emotional day. I drove to work and let my thoughts get away from me. At times, I had tears streaming down my face. I took actions from one situation and dwelled on them and let them work their way into other memories and thoughts. Gary knew I was upset when I left for work and called me shortly after I got to the office. Part of the reason I felt so bad, is that I felt that I had failed in my mission to reconnect the class. He said that I do a fantastic job and some people are just jerks. I refrained from commenting on the posts but by noon, I had had enough. I wrote a few words and said I was done with it all. It broke my heart to give this up because I truly enjoy the work I put into our class, even though it involves a lot of time.
I had no plans for lunch and was looking for that comfort that food gives. I was vulnerable but was well aware of my goal to get this excess weight off. I'm not giving up on that. The best thing for lunch would be Subway, but that sounded like a cardboard sandwich to me. I could still get what I wanted in a portion that worked into my plan. I immediately started to search nutritional information. I ended at Steak n Shake and while I could have had more for dinner if I had Subway; but I was making it work, if I took my walk in the evening.
The afternoon drug by with nothing to pour myself into at work. I was so ready to head home. Gary and I had a talk about what was really bothering me and I pretty much realized I was looking at the situation in the wrong perspective. Not everything is always black and white. People say things to vent and you shouldn't take on their baggage. Positive actions and words are mood boosters but there are things to be learned from the negatives in life, as well. Taking things with a grain of salt, letting it blow over, letting people express their opinions. What's the saying. I may not agree with what you say but I will defend to the death your right to say it.
By evening, there were more positive comments on Facebook and I was feeling so much better. I had let things be thrown out of proportion and eventually things got worked out ... AGAIN. I can get so emotionally involved sometimes and it's something I have to work on. I need to just let things go.
There was another fly in the ointment last night and that was just when we were getting ready to head out for a walk, we had major thunder and lightning. We looked at the radar and decided a walk just wasn't going to happen. Disappointing because I was over in points for the day but still felt that much was achieved.