Yesterday I mentioned that I brought my workout clothes with me to the office to ensure that I would get my 5k training in because of not knowing whether the community center would be open because of the weather. All I can say is that I tried. I changed clothes and went into the company workout room only two find the two treadmills with people on them. I decided to go ahead and eat lunch and then perhaps those people would be finished with their workout. Well, perhaps they were but two different people were on the machines 30 minutes later. The snow didn't seem to be a major problem with the road conditions, so the only other answer would be to exercise after work. Since we're down to one car, Gary picked me up from work and when we got home I quickly made some meatballs, put them in some sauce and was off to the gym. I knew I picked up my IPOD on the way out but couldn't find it and had to do the treadmill without music (second time in a row as the IPOD was dead last time). I got through the session with the only problem being it seemed like the time was ticking away in slow motion. I had a gal running on the treadmill next to me and she certainly seemed to be a pro going at a consistent speed.
Tuesday nights are the best night for TV. Lots of favorite shows and we have the DVR working overtime. I especially enjoy The Biggest Loser. Last night there was a scene where the largest contestant was on the treadmill and challenged to go at a certain speed. I don't know what it was ... over 5 or 6 mph. All I know is that it was faster than I can go. I'm pushing myself at 4.5. Poofs of doubt starting showing up in my head. What kind of doubt? I don't know, I was just bothered. Gary said we should never compare ourselves to others ... either by different talents they have or how they perform. But doesn't that instill something in ourself to push us harder? Well, I guess it can also defeat us ... so, I guess I'll keep go along on the pace I'm on. At least I'm doing it but I still wonder why I can't do what they're doing. I don't know if it all goes back to the premise of being chosen last, or that you're no competition, so why even try. I question that maybe the reason I'm not any competition is because I don't have enough faith in myself so I'm trying a little harder. I mentioned a little about this and the word potential in a previous post. When I first went on Facebook, I was playing Scrabble and Lexulous quite a bit but I'd never win and then the games just quit. A couple of weeks ago, Gary challenged me to a game of Lexulous just between me and him and then another game also playing with a classmate that he plays with on a regular basis. I really tried hard and didn't make my usual quick moves but tried to make myself use strategy and it helped and I think I'm a better player now and even found out after a few games that I could even win. Some things in life are luck but there's also alot to be said with perseverance and drive but you walk a fine line if you trying to live up to someone else's goals.