Yesterday being the first day back entirely on plan, I felt I did quite well. Maybe I should say back on plan with eating as I did not exercise. It does seem like I'm starting completely over because in the very beginning I did not exercise right away. That does not mean I am not moving and just vegging out in front of the TV. I feel I am keeping quite active but noticed I'm very tired. I also noticed that trend when I first started slashing at the calories and eliminating junk ... maybe it's just a good sign that my body is making some adjustments and I will begin to see some results.
I had no problem with cravings or desires until evening and of course it was all in my mind ... AGAIN. We went to Applebee's for dinner and I got their Asian Crunch Salad listed in their "UNDER 550 CALORIE" menu. I had had an Asian Salad there before but this was new and for my taste quite disappointing. It just wasn't very flavorful. My mind was working in the same way when it wants what it wants ... it wasn't satisfied so it wanted something else. Gary offered me some of his steak but ... no, I had to work on the discipline. POPCORN ... POPCORN. Having some 94% fat free popcorn when I got home wouldn't throw me off plan, would it? Ooops, there's still some candy left over from Halloween (that stuff should have been thrown out weeks ago) ... no I've got to get through the first day with some discipline. Weighing ... yes weighing. I've got to weigh which is the most important satisfaction ... satisfying a food desire or satisfying the desire to lose those extra pounds and the snowball effect of losing.
When we got home I had to get the rest of the Christmas decorations out of the storage tubs to finish decorating before we leave for Maryland tomorrow. After I did that I don't know whether it was being too tired or too lazy, I didn't make it into the kitchen. I just fell asleep on the couch and finally made it upstairs to bed without any snacking.
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
Monday, November 29, 2010
Back to the Basics
You know better, you prepare, you have all this support out there and then you kick yourself for not following through. The scales are up this morning and it's really no surprise. On the heels of vacation came Thanksgiving with a couple of celebrations and the few days prior to that I was fighting some sort of malady I returned from vacation with and my guard was down ... no exercise, no control over eating, no discipline, so obviously no loss.
It's all behind me now and I was glad to get on the scales this morning to have a new beginning. Not that it is going to get any easier. We're leaving for Maryland on Wednesday to visit the kids but I will be under control and drink lots of water on the trip. Something else that I've been slacking on.
While I am starting over, I still am happy with my success. I have to use that as a stepping stone to convince myself while it's a long hard road, there is much to benefit from. I'm starting to see a small change and don't want to give that up. It gives me desire to want more and I don't want to lose that confidence to believe in myself.
It's all behind me now and I was glad to get on the scales this morning to have a new beginning. Not that it is going to get any easier. We're leaving for Maryland on Wednesday to visit the kids but I will be under control and drink lots of water on the trip. Something else that I've been slacking on.
While I am starting over, I still am happy with my success. I have to use that as a stepping stone to convince myself while it's a long hard road, there is much to benefit from. I'm starting to see a small change and don't want to give that up. It gives me desire to want more and I don't want to lose that confidence to believe in myself.
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
Just Here
Back from our trip and the scale didn't go crazy so I'm okay with that. I think I maintained but can never be sure with the home scale. Not feeling all that great physically and the mental part has shifted as well. I'm not overeating but it just seems harder and more of a fight.
When I talked to my son on my birthday he mentioned that they are going back to DisneyWorld in October when they have their Half Marathon. Erick, Kim and our oldest grandson, Brandon are planning on running in it. I told him maybe I should consider it, as well. Could I really run ... I think I could walk but don't know about running? If it could become a reality ... I guess I better start training, huh?
When I talked to my son on my birthday he mentioned that they are going back to DisneyWorld in October when they have their Half Marathon. Erick, Kim and our oldest grandson, Brandon are planning on running in it. I told him maybe I should consider it, as well. Could I really run ... I think I could walk but don't know about running? If it could become a reality ... I guess I better start training, huh?
Friday, November 19, 2010
Happy New Year
I want to thank everyone for my birthday wishes. I gave given myself a very valuable gift today with the weight that I have left behind. There is less of me but in the same token so much more. More seft worth, self confidence, self esteem. I am FULL of life. I am truly blessed with good health and a loving family and I hope to have a better attitude from this point going forward. There are so many things to be thankful for and I plan to open my eyes to them every day.
I do feel that I've come quite a distance. I was somewhat frustrated yesterday. I was very conscious of my behavior yesterday and kept fighting all the excuses that could be used to overeat. By our evening meal, I was tried of fighting and decided to let myself go. As I stood in front of the dessert table at the buffet, that little voice in my head .... remember that little voice that seems to torment us sometime .... surely you too have listened to it many times???? Well, that little voice was saying. Look around, is there anything that great or that you can't live without. Is there anything that is there TODAY that is worth the questions you are going to ask yourself tonight when you lie you head on the pillow. I stood there like I was frozen in time and finally answered myself ... no, not TODAY and walked back to our table.
This morning I slept in or at least it felt like it. There's an hour difference in time where we are. I didn't make it to the gym yesterday as we were just getting settled and our schedule was somewhat irractic. We did do a surmountable amount of walking though. However, this morning I being determined to give myself the best year of my life going forward, I hit the gym. 45 minutes on the bike and 10 minutes on the treadmill. That's the first time for today ... I'm not giving up hope that I will go back because the gym is open until 11:00 p.m.
I don't know how often I'll be able to blog on this trip as there is not wifi in the room. I have to go to the lobby and it just depends on our schedule. Did you know that the percentages for success go up tremendously if you give yourself credit for how far you've come. There's something to say for confidence. Hold up your head and move forward.
I do feel that I've come quite a distance. I was somewhat frustrated yesterday. I was very conscious of my behavior yesterday and kept fighting all the excuses that could be used to overeat. By our evening meal, I was tried of fighting and decided to let myself go. As I stood in front of the dessert table at the buffet, that little voice in my head .... remember that little voice that seems to torment us sometime .... surely you too have listened to it many times???? Well, that little voice was saying. Look around, is there anything that great or that you can't live without. Is there anything that is there TODAY that is worth the questions you are going to ask yourself tonight when you lie you head on the pillow. I stood there like I was frozen in time and finally answered myself ... no, not TODAY and walked back to our table.
This morning I slept in or at least it felt like it. There's an hour difference in time where we are. I didn't make it to the gym yesterday as we were just getting settled and our schedule was somewhat irractic. We did do a surmountable amount of walking though. However, this morning I being determined to give myself the best year of my life going forward, I hit the gym. 45 minutes on the bike and 10 minutes on the treadmill. That's the first time for today ... I'm not giving up hope that I will go back because the gym is open until 11:00 p.m.
I don't know how often I'll be able to blog on this trip as there is not wifi in the room. I have to go to the lobby and it just depends on our schedule. Did you know that the percentages for success go up tremendously if you give yourself credit for how far you've come. There's something to say for confidence. Hold up your head and move forward.
Wednesday, November 17, 2010
He clarified the goal
This will be a short post. I'm doing this on my Kindle in the car and it's painfully slow ... just like seeing results when you're dieting ... but I'll get there. I had my physical this morning and the doc did say he was very pleased with my weight loss and congratulated me and said he knew it wasn't an easy thing to accomplish. He asked how much I weighed when I got married. I said there was no way I could get to that weight. I think I was at 128. He said 150 to 155 would be good. I guess I now have a goal. Before seeinng him I thought I would continue losing until I really struggled and I would take that as my cue that was my ideal weight. Maybe that'd be too easy or turn out to be a copout. So whatever .. it's still one pound at a time.
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
Try, Try Again
My weigh-in last night showed me with a gain of one pound. My last gain was in August. I'm over it and ready to move forward. Lots of activities in the weeks ahead. In about 1/2 hour my department at work will be celebrating my birthday. I tried to get out of this by not being here on Friday but they moved it until today. I told the gal who has my name that I didn't want a dessert, she said something about fruit, so we'll see. I would have been happy with only my office decorated, but they didn't even do that ... that's okay, it nothing special anyway ... YES, it is. Just because I'm 61 doesn't mean that I'm not still like a kid excited about her birthday.
I have my annual physical tomorrow and I know the doc will probably say something. He's not one of those that only lectures you when you need to lose and doesn't say anything when you do. I'm sure he'll be happy about my weight and hopefully it will reflect in my bloodwork.
After the doctor, we will be on the road. Going to get away for a few days to celebrate my birthday. Like I did before, I plan on hitting the gym everyday while we're there and choose wisely at the buffet. I did it before. I'm getting in the right mindset to do it again.
The big problem that faces me is that I will not be weighing in for the next three to four weeks as we will be traveling every weekend, including Mondays between now and then and I won't be making my TOPS meetings. I will be using my home scales to be accountable and hopefully go back to TOPS with a loss.
I have my annual physical tomorrow and I know the doc will probably say something. He's not one of those that only lectures you when you need to lose and doesn't say anything when you do. I'm sure he'll be happy about my weight and hopefully it will reflect in my bloodwork.
After the doctor, we will be on the road. Going to get away for a few days to celebrate my birthday. Like I did before, I plan on hitting the gym everyday while we're there and choose wisely at the buffet. I did it before. I'm getting in the right mindset to do it again.
The big problem that faces me is that I will not be weighing in for the next three to four weeks as we will be traveling every weekend, including Mondays between now and then and I won't be making my TOPS meetings. I will be using my home scales to be accountable and hopefully go back to TOPS with a loss.
Monday, November 15, 2010
The Fire's Out
I struggled all weekend and that's about it. I'm very emotional like it used to be with PMS. There's always tomorrow but I seem to be walking such a fine line with so much ahead of me. Faking it until I make it seemed to backfire this time but we'll see what happens.
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