Thursday, April 19, 2012

To Be Continued

I saw what I needed to see on the scale this morning. It wasn't surprising because I knew that some of my vacation gain was just water. It was an easy two pounds lost. I'm sure the remaining amount will take some effort. I put forth that effort yesterday, not succeeding totally but in the right direction.

I knew the best lunch yesterday would be Subway and while it's a deal to get their "meal", I opted for just a Turkey sub and drink .... no chips. Chips were part of my downfall on vacation. They were also something I gave up for Lent and when the time of sacrifice was over with the arrival of Easter, I over indulged.

When Gary called to see about supper, I told him that I should just skip it. He was right when he said I had to eat something so when I said it needed to be something light, he suggested a spinach salad from Jockomo. Fine, that'll work. I immediately started looking up the point count for the salad. I know it's important not to starve yourself for many reasons and to stay pretty consistent with calories. At first I told myself that I would get the small size and order the dressing on the side, but I caved and ordered a large salad because I was light on points for the day. My other sacrifice during lent was hot bread and here I was faced with it again at dinner when Gary ordered breadsticks. Things kept running through my head ... okay I'll have one, no one is too many ... I'll just break off a little and dip it in the cheese ... why can't I do what I set out to do ... I am only having a salad, couldn't I have a breadstick too? Why did I want the breadstick? Was it more about depriving myself or testing myself? The big conflict was it sitting in front of me while Gary is eating and thinking about it. I should have had them bring my salad at the same time ... but I felt strong and just kept thinking about how good the salad would taste trying to take my thoughts away from the bread.

Success but another complication. My salad was served with the dressing on it and not on the side like I had requested. I should have sent it back but I couldn't wait again with bread and pizza in front of me ... I ate my LARGE spinach salad drenched in dressing. While I didn't do what I set out to do and that really bugs me, I still did better than I what I could have done. I find success in that and maybe it will help me in my decisions today.

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