TGIF

Yay! I'm ready for the weekend but it's going to be a busy one.

Yesterday went well. Quieter than I like and pretty boring come to think about it but okay. I could have made more out of it, I guess ... but again my choice.

Mind VS Body

While at lunch last Monday, one of the ladies asked if anyone had heard of the Paleo Diet. She went on to explain that this diet is a wheat-free, starch-free, gluten-free, dairy-free and legume-free diet. Joyce's daughter's MIL has been on it for a couple of years and has found alot of success. It's also know as the Caveman diet or hunt and gather diet. Lots of protein, vegetables and fruits, along with some nuts but none of the things first mentioned.

You can see how restrictive it is. I'm thinking that if you have enough discipline that you can stick to this diet, why can't you just use that discipline and eat normally but moderately. Many say it's better for the body to eat clean or healthy and the body will crave the "good foods".

I applaud the people that can stick to that type of regimen but I don't think what my body wants is the problem, it's what is in my head.

There are some things that I haven't had in eight days. Candy, hot bread or rolls (the only bread I have is in a sandwich), potato chips, donuts. Why ... because they are items I gave up for lent. It's been tough, especially the potato chips because on two occasions over the weekend, I've had them sitting in front of me when I've ordered a sandwich. I stood in front of the vending machine yesterday in a moment of weakness but was avoiding the candy and chips at all costs. The breadsticks Gary ordered the other night were calling to me but there was no way I was going to touch them. I don't know why but I didn't just give up just one thing for Lent, I gave up several but I'm okay with that. It's a sacrifice I'm willing to make for Jesus who make such a huge sacrifice for me. If I give in, it would definitely sadden my heart.

So if I can do that for six weeks, why can't my brain cooperate with an occasional restriction to put me in a better position on weigh-in day? I'm beginning to think it's all in the way it's perceived. Am I thinking it's a permanent deprivation concept instead of a temporary one? Never having something is permanent but doing without something occasionally cannot be considered being deprived. We've got to change the message, at least I do.

Happy Birthday Gary

Yesterday was Gary's birthday. No big celebration was planned. Just a quiet evening. The last few years I haven't know what to get him. I picked up a "Tall Ships" book at an antique store over the weekend and he seemed to think it was a perfect gift.

We had planned on going to the gym and then to Jockomo's for dinner but only half of that happened. We will be going to the gym tonight.

I can't seem to get away from the daily annoyances but that's life. It does appear that I am handling them better though. At least I didn't have strangers yelling at me. I know it was intimidation but knowing doesn't always make it easier.

I've stayed off the scale purposely but think I need to start weighing daily to avoid the uncertainties that are rumbling around in my head. New motto ... face it and move on.

Synopsis

Weigh In -- Gained 2 1/2 pounds

Emotion -- Disappointment

Attitude -- Let it Go and Move On

Quote -- Life is what happens when you're busy making plans.

Solution -- I may be trying too hard with too much focus on the wrong goal which means when things don't go the way I want them to go, I fall ... I fall very hard. I need to look for a different way to play the game. Not sure what kind of results I'll get, but I hope I can deal with it better than I have.

Out of Sorts

It's Monday and I have a cloud hanging over my head. I had hoped when I got on the scale this morning to see at the very worse no movement. Honestly, I have been aware of what I have eaten over the past two weeks and I truly thought that I could fulfill my mission to not have gained while traveling. I said "NO" many times and avoided many pitfalls that I have experienced in the past. I even tried to keep to my exercise schedule working out in hotel workout rooms. I did allow myself some things I could have probably avoided but thought this would just be the times I ate normally and would maintain ... guess I was wrong. The scale reported a two pound gain. I know that some of that can be voided out before I actually step on the TOPS scale tonight but am afraid not enough. I have already had two disappointments at work this morning where it's apparent that I screwed up due to not understanding what was conveyed ... my fault/their fault ... who knows, so Monday is not starting off to be a good day. I am also faced with a company celebration luncheon at Fogo. Today is just not looking good. It's going to take all I have in me not to give up ... or even stop until the next time. I'm not sure I have it 100% in me to persevere. I know each day I have a new chance to start over and I want to say that'll be tomorrow. However, I have let too many tomorrows slip by. I keep asking myself, what am I going to do, what am I going to be faced with? So unsure ... so down. But what choice do I have. I'll face the music and rewrite what I need to make this work.

Smooth Skating ? ? ?

Last night we went to our grandchildren's school skating party. Before we got there, I kept having flashbacks of the times we took Stephanie and Erick to their skating parties and even attending my own when I was in grade school. I wondered if it would be as much fun as it was then and if I would skate around the rink with the breeze in my hair or end up sitting on the floor. I was surprised that after awhile I had my balance with the occasional wobble. I did end up on the floor a couple of times but it was due to avoiding some little ones falling in front of me. All in all it was a fun evening and I think a little bit of exercise too. I'm a little sore but I think it's from my bruises and not overworked muscles

I haven't been on the scales for over a week and am curious where I am. However, I'm totally fearful to get on them in the fragile mood I've been in this week. I'm thinking that if I stay off of them, even though I feel like I've gained, I'll be more vigilant to turn things around thinking that there's hope, rather than getting on the scales, seeing a gain and not knowing if I can reduce the number before weighing in on Monday. Also I guess there's a chance that just because I've felt bloated, bigger and blah all week maybe I haven't gained at all and if I weigh myself and see a loss, I'll loosen the reins and that can be dangerous if I'm away this weekend. Guess I just need to hold steady.

Status

I'm still here. I'm doing okay.

My schedule is a little screwy with the traveling. Since I exercised at the hotel we were staying at on Monday, I went to the gym last night. I had no trouble on the bike, but it was all I could do to do a mile on the treadmill.

I'm hoping I can get to the gym tomorrow before I head off on a Girl's Get Away weekend, so that I can get my three session in this week. That's important to me. I wasn't counting on working tomorrow but my boss is coming back early.

Going to get some exercise tonight by going to Jacob and Gracie's school skating party. It's been years since I was on roller skates, but I remember it being fun.